Wednesday, February 23, 2011

100. Free

Genre: Drama
Characters:  Ramone, Angel, Raul, Yolanda
Prompt: 100. Writer's Choice -Free
Word Count: 633 ish
Rating: R
Type: series
Summary: Justice from and unlikely source
Warnings: language
** Blah shots







“You should have left her alone like I said!” Angel whispered in Ramone’s ear as she adjusted the pillows behind him. It’s been five days and he was still battered, bruised and recovering from the loss of a kidney. Since the arrival at the hospital they’d dealt with a series of events including Eric’s attempt to get to Ramone, police interrogations, and there was still the absence of Yolanda.
“Had she not called for help I would have died.”
“But she didn’t call for you! She called for Wilson! You were stabbed in the kidney and you missed his appendix by an inch! If Wilson hadn’t been hurt, she would have left you out there to die!”
“Eso es suficiente, Angel.” Raul eased out the chair to defuse his daughter’s anger. “The point is, she called and they got him here in time.” 
“But Papi-” Their eyes drifted to a figure standing in the doorway. 



“Yoyo!” Ramone grinned as Angel and Raul rushed her, throwing their arms around her, flooding her with kisses. “¿Dónde has estado mi amor?” Raul caressed her check lovingly, examining her fully.
“I had some things I had to take care of.” She lowered her arms and walked toward Ramone. By his bedside, she hugged him tight, kissing the top of his head with her eyes shut. “What did you have to take care of for five days, Ma?” Angel crossed her arms suspiciously. Another knock on the door, a tall pale man with thick brown curly hair stepped in, the letters “F.B.I” in big bold letters were on his vest. 




Ramone’s eyes flew to his side in disbelief. “Yoyo?” 
“The bruises Ramone. The bruises on that girl’s ribs were a wake up call for me. A reminder that not only was I failing those girls but failing you too.” She took a step back. “After we left the bridal shop, I went to see Anna and apologized for every way that I’ve wronged her by ignoring our granddaughter,” She looked up at Raul briefly then shamefully lowered her eyes, “I found my way to Renee’s and begged her for her forgiveness as well before I turned myself in. I told them everything. How I followed you to that dirty shack and how I heard that girl cry while you…” She trailed off. “It just so happens that they were on to you since you left DNA behind.”




“Congratulations, it’s a boy!” The agent said sarcastically.
“I should have done this a long time ago. Maybe had I, no one else would have suffered as Anna, Cian and Renee have. I love you Ramone! All I ever wanted was to protect you but instead, I enabled you and for that I will suffer. You’re my baby boy but you’re also a monster and the very sight of you and my own reflection disgusts me!” 


“Ma?” His turned as quickly as he could toward her and quickly glance over his shoulder at his father and sister. “Ma, don’t do this!” He held his hand out for her. “Tell him it’s a lie! That none of that happened!” He wailed frantically.
“I’m sorry, Angel, Raul! Please do everything you can to help Anna out. Kayla is a beautiful little girl and she is going to need you now more than ever!”
Mi amor?” Raul pulled her into an embraced that she quickly removed herself from, sliding her 10k diamond ring from her finger. “Forgive me. I never deserved this and don’t deserve you.” She kissed his chin gently. “I’m ready now.” She turned toward the agent with her head hung low.
“What’s happening?” Angel mumbled through her tears, jumping in her mother’s path.
“I’m freeing the world of a ruthless rapist and accepting my responsibility in this.”
“Ma!” Ramone cried from the bed behind her. “Ma please!”
“I love you Ramone. I love you all.” She backed out of the room barely able to contain her own tears. The second she disappeared from the doorway, two more agents appeared, waiting for the doctor's ok to take Ramone into custody and escorting him back to Mexico.

5 comments:

Valpre said...

Wow!

I'm in shock, and I don't know if I should laugh or cry. I keep reading it over, thinking I've missed something, and one of the characters is dreaming or something.

So Ramone's ass is off to jail? Really? That's it? It's really over? And Will and Cian can be happy now?

OMG! *does happy dance*

I knew Yoyo was slowly coming around, but I didn't expect her to step up and take so much responsibility. Now that she's going to jail I feel sad for her. It's bad enough to know she birthed this monster, and now she has to pay for his mistakes. I think being Ramone's mom is punishment enough.

Coming back to Ramone, I hope he does become someone's bitch in prison. I don't expect you to show that scene, but just throw it in somewhere, in passing maybe. LOL. :)

I loved your use of the prompt word. Very fitting. Great job.

DaijahV said...

HOLY FUCK YES!!! OMG AN UPDATE!!! WOOOOO! Hasta la vista Ramone! I hope his soft ass gets mercilessly penetrated with a broken plunger handle repeatedly!! Graphic much? You bet your ass it was!

I love that Yoyo came forward finally, but she still waited too long for this...so many other lives have been broken because of her silence!

Just an awesome awesome ending or events! I don't feel sorry for anyone in this family except Raul I love that man and he still owes me a dance. I know he'll stand by his wife which is one of the things that turns me on about him...so devoted!

I can't believe...yes I can...that Ramone STILL refuses to accept reality! Time to grow up and take your beatings like a fucking man!

He should have lost more than a kidney, but I am glad he did lose more than his freedom (ironic title lol and I LOVE THE prompt title!!) Perfect for such magnificent writing!

Ahhhh <---sigh of relief. Me so so happy!

Jillyson said...

Please, please promise me you'll show him as a prison bitch, just once!

Anonymous said...

wow...i definitely wasnt expecting that. actually i was starting to think ramone may had off'd his own mother. bout time she came to her senses

Anonymous said...

woooooohooooooooo that motherfucker going to jail. *stinky legging*